It is the night before and nothing has been bought. This is a better position than it feels like.
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Ask a small child a fixed set of questions about their dad and write down the answers exactly as given. How old is he. What is he best at. What does he always say. What is his job.
The answers are funny, wrong in a specific way, and completely of this year. Adults keep these for decades. A drawing gets a fortnight on the fridge; the interview goes in a drawer and survives house moves.
"He is 100" and "he is best at sleeping" are the whole value. The moment an adult tidies the answers it becomes a card the adult wrote.
A certificate with one specific, true thing on it — "best at pancakes", "carries me on his shoulders" — takes five minutes and lands better than a generic bought card, because it is evidence someone noticed.
About three, once a child answers a question with more than a nod. It is at its funniest between four and seven.
You write, they dictate, and you write exactly what they say. Do not smooth it out.
Yes, unchanged. Swap the questions.
Part of our guide to Gifts kids can give.